What is proper etiquette when hosting this shower?

I was a little hurt that one of my best friends didn't ask me to be a bridesmaid, even though her fiance` asked my husband to be in it. Despite that fact, I still wanted to throw her a shower. Her maid of honor and one bridesmaid live out of town. (I live out of town as well, but I at least grew up in the town where she is marrying, so I feel comfortable planning a shower long distance.) Her other two bridesmaids are her sisters, one which is too young to know about such events, and the other who doesn't really seem to care for her sister (the bride) much at all. I told her I wanted to throw her a shower, and she was ecstatic. I know traditionally the maid of honor or bridesmaids will host one and all pitch in on the money, and they can still throw her one if they want to (at her college, lingerie, etc). My question is who do I ask to help throw this one? Is it her maid of honor and bridesmaids, our other close friends, family members? Are there any other etiquette rules?

What is proper etiquette when hosting this shower?
I think that its really sweet of you to do this for her even though she didnt include you in her bridal party. I think your best bet is to speak to the other bridal party, let them know what your planning and recruit their help, including labour and money help. Also her mother or the mother of the groom might be a good person to ask for assistance they are usually well versed in these types of events.


A good website for bridal shower planning is theknot.com they have all kinds of good ideas and articles about etiquette, planning and tools to help you out. Beyond that I would say the web is a great place for game ideas, recipies for food etc. it can be a great tool but dont forget the rest of the bridal party or close family or friends for help as well. g/l hope it goes well!
Reply:thanks for the points hope the shower goes well! Report It

Reply:You can ask anyone to help with the shower.





Traditionally, the maid of honor, bridesmaids, mother of the bride and groom, and very close friends are good candidates for throwing and/or assisting in the shower. It is not uncommon for a bride to have more than one shower, i.e., one where she will be married, one where her family lives, one where his family lives.





I wouldn't step on anyone's toes, though, and I'd ask for the input of the mothers, maid of honor and bridesmaids, since technically it is their reponsibility far before it is yours.
Reply:Ask if they'd like to help plan. If not, fine. If so, have a list of tasks or items needed you can divvy up.
Reply:I wouldn't bother throwing her $hit if she didn't bother even asking you to be in the wedding! Let one of the other girls do that.
Reply:Why anyone would want to throw someone a bridal shower is beyond me! I didn't have one at my wedding a year ago because I can't stand those events. They are dumb, boring and a waste of time and money. I would've sat back and let her maid of honor handle things. You're just setting yourself up for a lot of work - and for what - she didn't even want you in her wedding party!!!!
Reply:You need to talk to her maid of honor and other brides maids to find out what they're planning.....otherwise, I would do a family one.....this is hard! I've been in a few weddings the past couple years, and what we've done is have 1 big shower for everyone (friends, family, etc.). That way, everyone is taken care of in one shot....good luck with everything!

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